Toys are very important now, particularly his Sophie giraffe, a ridiculously expensive French toy that he adores and tries to eat.
But I could be wrong. Most of the time he's pretty happy.
Friday, January 4, 2013
Changes
He's changing so fast. Three weeks ago, I could put him in his bouncer chair and he would just stare at the toys and sort of smile or reach out shyly to touch one of them. Then about two weeks ago, he started grabbing them one at a time and laughing. Today he had one in his right hand and was yanking the other with his left.
Toys are very important now, particularly his Sophie giraffe, a ridiculously expensive French toy that he adores and tries to eat.
He gets extremely frustrated when he can't do something, like if he tries to get a toy in his mouth and can't quite make it work. Today he spent 20 minutes trying to eat a talking lantern and then started screaming with rage. I worry that he is going to be like me - "I can't do this! EXPLODE!" I have a feeling that my future may include many heart-to-heart talks about how practice makes perfect and how we have to control our emotions.
But I could be wrong. Most of the time he's pretty happy.
Toys are very important now, particularly his Sophie giraffe, a ridiculously expensive French toy that he adores and tries to eat.
But I could be wrong. Most of the time he's pretty happy.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Sick boy update
I took Eli to the doctor today just to check on his nasty cough. He's fine. He's just getting over the cold, and his lungs are super clear. He weighs 14 pounds now. Crazy. He smiled through the check-up, and then we went to play with Grandma for awhile. She wore him out, so he had to take a little nap.
In other news, I go back to work on Monday. It's funny, when he was first born, there were rough days where a part of me just wanted to go to work for a few hours to escape. Now all I want to do is stay home with him. I'm glad we had a lot of time together, though, and I am glad that his awesome grandma and grandpa are going to be taking care of him. We are having an issue now where he is refusing to take a bottle. Obviously, this is a huge problem. If anyone has any advice on how to make that work, I would sure love to hear it.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
Sick boy
Eli has a cold. Despite my best efforts, all the disinfecting wipes and keeping him inside, getting shots and all sorts of things, germs have invaded their way into my little darling's body.
It sucks. It is so sad, and it is so scary because I'm crazy with worry, and this is not even a real illness. He's not running a fever, and he still smiles a lot. It's just a cold.
Is there such a thing as postpartum terror?
Last night we could not get him to sleep in his bed - he kept waking himself up coughing and then would cry for one of us. The only way he was comfortable was when he was held, which makes sense. Sometimes when I'm sick the only thing that makes me happy is my mom.
So I rocked him for a couple of hours while I finished reading Anne Lamott's Operating Instructions, a memoir about her son's first year. I came across these lines:
"I look down into his staggeringly lovely little face, and I can hardly breathe sometimes. He is all I have ever wanted, and my heart is so huge with love that I feel like it is about to go off. At the same time I feel that he has completely ruined my life, because I just didn't used to care all that much."
Truth.
It sucks. It is so sad, and it is so scary because I'm crazy with worry, and this is not even a real illness. He's not running a fever, and he still smiles a lot. It's just a cold.
Is there such a thing as postpartum terror?
Last night we could not get him to sleep in his bed - he kept waking himself up coughing and then would cry for one of us. The only way he was comfortable was when he was held, which makes sense. Sometimes when I'm sick the only thing that makes me happy is my mom.
So I rocked him for a couple of hours while I finished reading Anne Lamott's Operating Instructions, a memoir about her son's first year. I came across these lines:
"I look down into his staggeringly lovely little face, and I can hardly breathe sometimes. He is all I have ever wanted, and my heart is so huge with love that I feel like it is about to go off. At the same time I feel that he has completely ruined my life, because I just didn't used to care all that much."
Truth.
Eli's Second Day
The little man got a clean bill of health from the doctors, and so did I. I also felt like moving around and walking some more, so that was good. More visitors came, including Travis's mom and grandparents. I spent an hour playing with the little guy's hands and feet. I got to eat some real food.
I was still on the pain meds and still was not able to lie flat. All the visitors, doctors, and nurses coming and going made it hard for me to get any rest - Eli didn't have this problem. He slept like a champ during the day. My parents came by and told Travis to go home and have a nap, which he did gladly. He also wanted to take one of Eli's swaddling blankets home so that the dogs could get used to his smell. By late afternoon, I was so exhausted and overwhelmed and frustrated at not being able to get around and take care of Eli. I couldn't nurse him under the cover and people were constantly in and out, and I finally just lost it and broke down. No one can prepare a person for the crazy feelings at the beginning of parenthood.
I finally got a short nap and shower, and I felt better after that. This was good, because Eli's second night was about the same as the first. We were up all night long trying to soothe him. I whispered to him that he was going to love the world and that I knew it was scary, but he would get used to it. It must be really frightening to be a baby.
Like clockwork - he went to sleep just in time for people to begin showing up. I was happy, though, because we were ready to go home.
I was still on the pain meds and still was not able to lie flat. All the visitors, doctors, and nurses coming and going made it hard for me to get any rest - Eli didn't have this problem. He slept like a champ during the day. My parents came by and told Travis to go home and have a nap, which he did gladly. He also wanted to take one of Eli's swaddling blankets home so that the dogs could get used to his smell. By late afternoon, I was so exhausted and overwhelmed and frustrated at not being able to get around and take care of Eli. I couldn't nurse him under the cover and people were constantly in and out, and I finally just lost it and broke down. No one can prepare a person for the crazy feelings at the beginning of parenthood.
I finally got a short nap and shower, and I felt better after that. This was good, because Eli's second night was about the same as the first. We were up all night long trying to soothe him. I whispered to him that he was going to love the world and that I knew it was scary, but he would get used to it. It must be really frightening to be a baby.
Like clockwork - he went to sleep just in time for people to begin showing up. I was happy, though, because we were ready to go home.
Eli's First Day - Part 2
My parents, my Aunt Lois, and my brother came back to see the little guy. He was a little trooper and didn't seem to mind being passed around from person to person. In fact, he was pretty laid back, and I started to think that we had the best baby the world had ever known. Travis changed his first diaper. I wanted to help, but I couldn't get out of bed. This would be a recurring theme over the next couple of days.
The rest of the day was pretty easy and exciting. We just kept marveling over the little man. A few visitors came and went. We got the hang of feeding pretty easily. I was on a liquid diet plus painkillers. In the afternoon, Travis's Uncle Jeff came by and I threw up in front of him which was pretty humiliating.
By the time evening rolled around, I was out of bed and sitting in a chair. I was happy to be moving around, but the whole ordeal was pretty horrendous. The nurses kept telling me to make sure I took the meds so I could stay ahead of the pain. I took their advice, but it was terrible because here I was trying to be a mom and I was in a drug-induced fog most of the time. I was also really uncomfortable and could not stand to lie flat.
Eli slept most of the day. By the evening, he decided he didn't want to sleep anymore, and he was NOT happy. It was horrible - constant crying and Travis walking him around and trying to calm him. I helped as much as I could, but it was hard because I was so tired and the meds made that much worse. At one point, Travis climbed in bed with me and Eli because that was the only way to make him stop crying (which is a cute thought now but was really annoying at the time). I'm sure that we were a ridiculous sight.
He decided to go to sleep around 6am. We were so thankful and started trying to get some shuteye ourselves, but at that point the doctors started coming around to check on him and me. Then visitors arrived. It was the first of many sleepless nights.
The rest of the day was pretty easy and exciting. We just kept marveling over the little man. A few visitors came and went. We got the hang of feeding pretty easily. I was on a liquid diet plus painkillers. In the afternoon, Travis's Uncle Jeff came by and I threw up in front of him which was pretty humiliating.
By the time evening rolled around, I was out of bed and sitting in a chair. I was happy to be moving around, but the whole ordeal was pretty horrendous. The nurses kept telling me to make sure I took the meds so I could stay ahead of the pain. I took their advice, but it was terrible because here I was trying to be a mom and I was in a drug-induced fog most of the time. I was also really uncomfortable and could not stand to lie flat.
Eli slept most of the day. By the evening, he decided he didn't want to sleep anymore, and he was NOT happy. It was horrible - constant crying and Travis walking him around and trying to calm him. I helped as much as I could, but it was hard because I was so tired and the meds made that much worse. At one point, Travis climbed in bed with me and Eli because that was the only way to make him stop crying (which is a cute thought now but was really annoying at the time). I'm sure that we were a ridiculous sight.
He decided to go to sleep around 6am. We were so thankful and started trying to get some shuteye ourselves, but at that point the doctors started coming around to check on him and me. Then visitors arrived. It was the first of many sleepless nights.
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Eli's first day - Part 1
I will try to keep this as non-gory as possible, but no promises. Proceed at your own risk.
When I first became pregnant (ugh, I hate the word), all of these people wanted to tell me their birth stories. I didn't really understand that, and it kind of made me laugh at the time, but now I get it. I do have this strange urge to share my experience - after all, it is by far the craziest, most monumental event of my life thus far (Is that sad? Should I have partied more in my youth?).
Anyway, I also feel like I need to write this all down while I still remember it. I guess Eli might want to read it someday. Then again, he's a boy, so maybe not. But here goes.
We knew for quite awhile that a C-section was likely for us because little man was stubborn and insisted on being face up. I held out hope up to the very end, trying to talk him into flipping, doing ridiculous yoga moves I found on the internet, getting ultrasounds every week for the last month to see if maybe he had changed position. No dice.
Yay for spending $75 on a class that covered mostly labor techniques and pain management!
Anyway, we were scheduled for Thursday morning, early. I was pretty nervous - the extent of my surgical experience being wisdom teeth removal. The nurse began getting me ready, which was really weird, and I hated being the center of attention. She started me on IV fluids which was a disaster - she ended up spilling fluid and blood all over me. I kind of felt sorry for her, but it really made me nervous. She gave Travis some scrubs, and wheeled me down the hall into the operating room - that part was fun.
The lights were super bright, and there was so much activity going on. I started to get a little lightheaded. The only thing I was truly nervous about was the spinal block. I hate needles, and just the word "spinal" makes me feel kind of nauseous. Slice me open - no problem; stick a needle into my back - panic! Anyway, it was really no big deal except that I got so nervous that when they were done and asked me to lie back on the table, I got lightheaded again and ended up almost kicking over a metal table of surgical tools. Then the nurse anesthetist leaned down and told me that my blood pressure had dropped and I would probably throw up. Great! Then Travis came in with the doctor. He had talked her into letting him stand to watch the procedure (usually they make the dads sit down so they don't pass out).
I didn't throw up. It was painless, but really weird. (I'll spare you the nastier details). The nurse anesthetist started laughing and told Travis, "Come here - you have to see this." As they pulled Eli out, he was peeing all over the doctor. She turned him around and he pooped on her. What a way to come into the world! Anyway, he started to cry, which was awesome. Then they brought him around the side to do his apgar scoring (He scored 9 both times - pin a rose on my nose!) and all of that important stuff. It was an amazing moment - indescribable. Travis was mesmerized. He was a big boy - 8lbs 2oz, 20 inches long. 9:26 in the morning.
The worst part of the whole ordeal was that I couldn't hold him right away. Travis had to hold him next to my face so I could look at him while they glued me back together (gross). We had fun laughing at the poor kid because he was trying so hard to open his eyes but the lights were too bright for him.
And before I knew it, we were being wheeled back to the room with a new little human. The nurse bathed him, and then I finally got my hands on him - a cute little thing covered with black hair. I think we just stared at each other for an hour - awesome.
When I first became pregnant (ugh, I hate the word), all of these people wanted to tell me their birth stories. I didn't really understand that, and it kind of made me laugh at the time, but now I get it. I do have this strange urge to share my experience - after all, it is by far the craziest, most monumental event of my life thus far (Is that sad? Should I have partied more in my youth?).
Anyway, I also feel like I need to write this all down while I still remember it. I guess Eli might want to read it someday. Then again, he's a boy, so maybe not. But here goes.
We knew for quite awhile that a C-section was likely for us because little man was stubborn and insisted on being face up. I held out hope up to the very end, trying to talk him into flipping, doing ridiculous yoga moves I found on the internet, getting ultrasounds every week for the last month to see if maybe he had changed position. No dice.
Yay for spending $75 on a class that covered mostly labor techniques and pain management!
Anyway, we were scheduled for Thursday morning, early. I was pretty nervous - the extent of my surgical experience being wisdom teeth removal. The nurse began getting me ready, which was really weird, and I hated being the center of attention. She started me on IV fluids which was a disaster - she ended up spilling fluid and blood all over me. I kind of felt sorry for her, but it really made me nervous. She gave Travis some scrubs, and wheeled me down the hall into the operating room - that part was fun.
The lights were super bright, and there was so much activity going on. I started to get a little lightheaded. The only thing I was truly nervous about was the spinal block. I hate needles, and just the word "spinal" makes me feel kind of nauseous. Slice me open - no problem; stick a needle into my back - panic! Anyway, it was really no big deal except that I got so nervous that when they were done and asked me to lie back on the table, I got lightheaded again and ended up almost kicking over a metal table of surgical tools. Then the nurse anesthetist leaned down and told me that my blood pressure had dropped and I would probably throw up. Great! Then Travis came in with the doctor. He had talked her into letting him stand to watch the procedure (usually they make the dads sit down so they don't pass out).
I didn't throw up. It was painless, but really weird. (I'll spare you the nastier details). The nurse anesthetist started laughing and told Travis, "Come here - you have to see this." As they pulled Eli out, he was peeing all over the doctor. She turned him around and he pooped on her. What a way to come into the world! Anyway, he started to cry, which was awesome. Then they brought him around the side to do his apgar scoring (He scored 9 both times - pin a rose on my nose!) and all of that important stuff. It was an amazing moment - indescribable. Travis was mesmerized. He was a big boy - 8lbs 2oz, 20 inches long. 9:26 in the morning.
The worst part of the whole ordeal was that I couldn't hold him right away. Travis had to hold him next to my face so I could look at him while they glued me back together (gross). We had fun laughing at the poor kid because he was trying so hard to open his eyes but the lights were too bright for him.
And before I knew it, we were being wheeled back to the room with a new little human. The nurse bathed him, and then I finally got my hands on him - a cute little thing covered with black hair. I think we just stared at each other for an hour - awesome.
Finding the time to write
I don't think anyone has ever read this blog other than family and friends, and if you fit into that category, then you know that we welcomed Elijah Monday to our world back in September. Since then (well, actually since before then if you want to get technical about it), Travis has been bugging me nonstop to blog about the kid. I wanted to tell his story from day one, I really did, but damn if raising a kid is not time-consuming.
Time-devouring would be a better term.
But all of a sudden, things have changed. Our little barely-human has turned into a baby - a fun baby who no longer wants to be carried around 24/7. And now I find myself having time to do things like shower, brush my teeth, eat lunch, etc. So I might try this blogging thing just because we have so many friends and family who are near and far who might like to hear about the little guy. And anyone who knows me knows that I am not good at the whole phone thing.
So...I might be updating this more often. We'll see how it goes. But if I start to become one of those crazy mommy-bloggers, I'm shutting this mofo down!
Time-devouring would be a better term.
But all of a sudden, things have changed. Our little barely-human has turned into a baby - a fun baby who no longer wants to be carried around 24/7. And now I find myself having time to do things like shower, brush my teeth, eat lunch, etc. So I might try this blogging thing just because we have so many friends and family who are near and far who might like to hear about the little guy. And anyone who knows me knows that I am not good at the whole phone thing.
So...I might be updating this more often. We'll see how it goes. But if I start to become one of those crazy mommy-bloggers, I'm shutting this mofo down!
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