House full of howler monkeys

Eli has just discovered that he can make really fun sounds with his mouth. After a few days of blowing raspberries, he has moved to shrieking. Non stop. Travis said, "It seriously sounds like we are living in a house full of howler monkeys."

This boy wants to walk

Since Eli was about 2 months old, he has been trying his hardest to stand. He will push his legs as hard as he can into my lap until I stand him up. Then he laughs and smiles until he can't stand it anymore, and then he gets angry.

Now he has a new favorite "toy":

15 things that have changed in the last 4 1/2 months

Everyone said that having kids would be life-changing, and I believed them to a certain extent. Still, there are a lot of changes that I didn't expect.

1. I have to plan 30 extra minutes for anything I do outside the house.
2. If I want to go anywhere by myself, it takes so much time to plan it's almost not worth it.
3. My stomach looks like a deflated inner tube, and my hair is falling out in clumps (normal, I'm told).
4. Travis and I spend more time talking about poop and spit up than anything else.
5. I've been a neglectful dog owner (poor Jax. Gotta remedy this one).
6. I don't pay attention to music. I have no idea what is on the radio now.
7. I can function on so little sleep, it's amazing to me.
8. Having said that, I do really stupid things at times because I am brain dead from lack of sleep. The other day I walked to another teacher's classroom to ask a question. She reminded me that I had already asked her like an hour earlier.
9. Travis has become the big reader in the house. Since I am in charge of the bedtime routine, he has read about 5 books to my 1. I am going through withdrawals.
10. My current favorite song is Will I Am's "What I Am" from Sesame Street. My mom uses it to distract Eli so he takes his bottle. It's on constant rotation in my head.
11. I am giving assignments faster than I can get the papers graded (gotta remedy this one too).
12. I can eat lunch in exactly 7 minutes.
13. I'm never lonely - there's always someone around who wants to cuddle.
14. I get to see my parents every day (since they are the saintly daycare providers).
15. That baby's smile makes all this crap (literal and figurative) worth it.

Friday update

We had an interesting week.

Grandma Brandon introduced Eli to one of his favorite new toys:

We finally started enjoying "tummy time":

He had his 4 month check-up at the doctor's office on Tuesday:

He's in the 50th percentile for weight and the 90th for height. Travis thinks the nurse made a mistake in her measurements. I just think he takes after my side of the family. Future basketball player? He had his immunizations and felt crummy the next day.

On Thursday evening, it started to snow. School was released early, so I flew to pick up the boy and we made our harrowing drive through the snow with all of the other Southerners who, like me, freak out at a single flake in the road. When we got home, there were a couple of inches on the ground and streets. Then the power went out. Travis couldn't get home because of all the wrecks and ice, so he went back to work, and we went next door to spend the evening in front of Travis's grandparents' fireplace. The snow and ice in the roads started to turn to slush, so Travis decided to try again, and he made it to us just in time for our power to come on again at 10:00.

Eli got to see his first snow:

Motherhood in the information age

Two days before Eli was born, I got my first smartphone. It's an iphone 4 that I was talked into getting instead of the free non-smartphone I was planning to get. I'm sure I was the salesman's dream customer. I thought it would be a good thing to have in case I needed to quickly and easily google for information about childrearing. Four months later, it has probably done more harm than good.

The amount of information available on the internet, in books, and from the mouths of elders is overwhelming to me as a new mom. I have spent countless hours reading, trying to figure out how to do the "right thing" for my child.

Sleeping, milestones, when to introduce the bottle, when NOT to introduce the bottle, tummy time, rashes, eye-contact, early signs of autism, naptime, flat head, poop color and consistency, when to introduce solids, age-appropriate play, age-appropriate toys, how to boost baby's IQ, how to boost baby's self-esteem...and so on...

And much of this information is contradictory. And much of it contradicts what grandmas think should be done. It's enough to make a mom crazy.

New moms (I'm going to go out on a limb and speak for all of us here) try so hard to do what is right for their kids. There is constant second-guessing and self-doubt and not a lot of positive feedback or way-to-gos. It's not like Eli can say to me, "Hey, thanks for ensuring that I got 30 minutes of tummy-time today. I'll be crawling right on time!" And sometimes the people around you can be rough, too.

There is a person close to me (who shall forever remain nameless) who has something negative to say about everything that I do with Eli. If he is wrapped in a blanket, he is too hot. If he's not wearing a hat (INDOORS), he is too cold. If he wants to stretch his legs out and practice standing, he's going to be bow-legged. His bedtime is too late. He got a cold because I took him out of the house. If I take him out in public, he will get the flu. I shouldn't be going back to work. I hold him too much. This person constantly tells me about "bad" moms and moms who don't bond with their babies.

A few weeks ago, I went to Walmart with Eli. A stranger stopped us to ask how old he was. I told her, and she said, "Well, he looks very happy and loved, and you look fantastic!" It made me feel so much better.

I say all that to say this: if you know a new mom or if you see one in public, give her a compliment if you can. It can make all the difference in the world for her confidence - and she needs that.

And tell her to put away the smartphone. :)

Lack of sleep at Casa del lunes

We're getting re-adjusted to my work schedule now, but it hasn't been easy. Eli is FINALLY taking a bottle. My mom has to distract him a bit with Sesame Street videos, but it works and he's eating and starting to nap better, too. His sleeping through the night has stopped now, but I have a feeling he'll get back on track pretty soon. I am so very tired. It feels similar to those first couple of weeks after he was born. Half the time I feel like a zombie. Today was a little better, though. He woke up a couple of times during the night, but he didn't wake up for the day until about 9. I can handle that. All these books and websites say he should be on a strict schedule, but I don't know how to make that happen. I guess I'm a bad mom. Whatever.

My dear friend Amber came to visit today with her little girl who is 2. It was so much fun to watch the little ones interact. Eli stared at her like crazy, and he couldn't stop smiling. I think they are going to be good friends.

It's hard to believe that he will be as big as she is in less than 2 years!

Back at work

I'm back at work now, and we're trying to get settled into a routine. Lots of guilt going through my head and heart at the moment. I feel guilty for leaving Eli, even though I know he's in capable, loving hands. I feel guilty at work, too, because I know I won't be able to be there for my students the way I was before. It's a strange feeling to be forcing myself to leave the building at 3:45 everyday instead of staying as late as necessary. Grading papers is going to present a problem.

I'm getting up at 5 AM now which is quite a shock to the system. It's a good thing the boy trained me on how to function with very little sleep! His routine has really been disrupted, too. We're trying to work on an earlier bedtime, but the little night-owl is fighting it. We got him to go to sleep about 30 minutes earlier than normal last night, so that's a start.

He's doing really well with my mom considering how much of a change everything is for him. He's drinking from the bottle (!) reluctantly. She did a good job today distracting him with Sesame Street so he didn't know what was going on. He's got a bad habit of eating in front of the TV already, just like his Mama.

On another, random note, I wish they made some of this baby equipment for grown-ups. He looks so relaxed and comfortable right now asleep in his swing, and his bouncer chair looks so comfy, too. I'd like one of those for the living room. Ooh, and the johnny-jump-up could help me get rid of some of this pregnancy weight!

I need a nap.